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| The Comedy Squad | ||
First up we had the thought-provoking Liam Mullone with some great anecdotes based loosely around the subject of our modern day obsession with "Health & Safety". He may look like a floppy-haired posh bloke in a suit but his wit is razor-sharp. His tale of the Leeds holidaymaker "attacked" by a jellyfish whilst swimming in Mexico was a masterly application of fact and logic to one man's throwaway remark. How can a creature that has no eyes, no skeleton, no means of propulsion and which has not had a single sentient thought since the dawn of time possibly be described as having ATTACKED somebody!!! "Ooh, there's a bloke from Leeds swimming over there - I'll just wait for the current to change and I'll have that b*st*rd!" Apparently the jellyfish's mouth is also its anus - so if one ever did say he attacked you he was talking out of his arse!!!
His meeting with a posh woman in a car park whilst driving his hearse (yes, he really does have one and can often be seen cruising round sunny south-east London in it) provided more comedic food for thought. Yes, Liam's carbon emissions are somewhat high - but what about posh woman's personal emissions - the five little monsters that she has seen fit to pop out of her f*nny and impose their lifetime's demands on the Earth's limited resources to the detriment of the rest of us?? Think logically, you right-on, self-righteous tw*ts was Liam's message.
Talking of kids, Liam was suspicious about Sunny Delight's new "sugar free" drink - ok, so there was no sugar but what about the other potentially dangerous additives it contains? He proceeded to to recite a mind-bogglingly long list of chemical compounds at an astonishing speed - an amazing (and amusing) feat of memory!
He then moved on to the H&S issues around the dubious, childhood game of "bumfinger" - were remember it? "YES!" came the over-enthusiastic reply from one man in the audience - surely not our very own Comedy Host Mikey??? Apparently "bumfinger" is a practice according to the H&S fascists - cue hysterical laughter at Liam's playground skit - "Stay away from Johnson, don't you know he's a practitioner of the art of Bumfinger!!" In case you don't know 'Bumfinger' according to 'Health and safety board' is "the practice of inserting a digit into one's anus and then applying to the nose or exposed skin of the opponent/vicim/s'.
Your intrepid Comedy Entrepreneurs discovered Liam's show at this year's Edinburgh Festival (yes, we cast our Comedy net far and wide to find new acts to tickle your funny bone) and it has to be said he has polished it up a treat since the Summer. So, if you like your comedy intelligent as well as pants-wettingly funny check out Liam the next time he appears in Bromley.
Open Spot this week saw Ged Butcher take the stage. His downbeat, deadpan delivery coupled with some great laugh-out loud one-liners mark him out as one to watch for the future.
Headlining we had the incomparable George Egg. Surreal, manic, innovative, whimsical, odd-ball - all these things and a lot more besides. No list of attributes can do justice to the sheer comedic joy George brings to the stage (along with the world's largest briefcase packed full of the oddest collection of props you'll ever see!!). Starting out silent, he was a modern-day Tommy Cooper with his visual gags and magic tricks-that-weren't. Truly, an heir to the great TC's comedy crown! Harking back to old variety style comics, yet with a totally modern, alternative comedy edge George is nothing short of a rib-tickling genius. "Tricks" with over-sized cards, spinning basketballs, ancient Spectrum computers - George produced them all from his gargantuan briefcase and then discards them as if he's never seen them before. He evokes gales of laughter with his surreal take on everyday life and the ordinary objects around us. If you want refreshing, zany, mind-boggling originality then look no further than the loveable bundle of mirth that is George Egg.
Ensuring the show ran smoothly as MC we had the ever-chucklesome Michael Fabbri - an old friend of Bromley Comedy. Great sketch about turning the tables on those Jehovah's Witnesses who disturb your sleep early on a weekend morning - Michael recommends banging their doors down and trying to convert them to the joys of non-believing by offering them the chance to get up late, laze around and do nothing much - and offering them a copy of N.U.T.S and the new Scientist where they'l find everything explained.
Getting into his stride on the religious theme Michael was puzzled about the Virgin Birth. What about Mary's hymen he speculated? JC surely broke it on the way out! Did he wear it as a sort of ancient, Biblical shower cap?? He must be the only man to break one with his head!!! Unless of course there has been a particularly nasty ballet dancing accident at some time!!!!
All in all it was refreshingly mad evening with some truly original talents on display - book early for next week Comedy fans to make sure you don't miss out on the next fantastic show!
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| The Comedy Squad | ||
Sort of like being in a funny coach crash on the M25 Jct4
The evening started well with the brilliant Charlie Baker compering. The man's a great stand-up AND, a jazz crooner too. Think of a funny Jamie Cullum only older, shorter, fatter, and with a West Country accent - if that aint comedy gold I don't know what is!! His brilliant Rat Pack compilation in the Devon stylee was a joy to hear, and his constant energy was infectious.
Moving on to the first act - we had our Canadian munchkin Manolis Zontanos. Had a couple of funny and interesting observations but moved swiftly on to knob gags (or anal bead/ blow job cum - gags) where pretty much the rest of his set remained.
I think if you were a bloke and you weren't sitting next to your wife or girlfriend you could of really let rip (and laugh). However most of the audience probably were, so some of the muted chuckles were quite awkward. What he did do which was funny is take the piss out of the fact that some of his gags weren't working and fell short. The audience felt free to laugh at this... he said he would be crying himself to sleep. It was all sort of good natured but maybe just not pitched to quite the right crowd.
Next up we had "Aliens Ate My Schnitzel" - apparently it took them seven years to think up that name - maybe they shoul have spend the same amount of time writing their material! The get-up were great and quite a good premise - taking the p*ss out of reality self-help shows (think Gillian McKeith et al). Quite good theatre but possibly needed few more GAGS there guys...
After some more silly banter and some good observational stuff by Charlie we had another of our North American cousins - Mr Rex Boyd. Some well observed stuff here of the "aren't you Brits crazy but also cute" variety (and also Bush is a C**t). The gem being East of London you have Essex. South of London you have Sussex, west, Wessex. But why isn't there a Nossex cos nobody wants to live in a place called NOSEX. Going on to say a lot of us live there already - if you're married you'll understand.
As a finale he did a scary juggling act to finish - yes really!!! We thought he was going to kill someone or himself but no such drama.
We did think he'd do well to separate his streetshow background for his comic routine and kill the audience with laughter... although Juggling sickles is quite amazing
So that's what you missed if you weren't there, and if you were there......er, you know all this already.
Quite a good show if youv'e had a couple or 3 beers/Pimm's which I think most of us had
Thought for the week - when was the last time you went to a comedy show and two different acts produced claw hammers as part of their set??? That's Bromley Comedy for you!!!
Heckler Put-Down of the Week (look out for regular feature HECKLE PUT-DOWN CORNER)
Two - courtesy of the terrific Charlie Baker
Audience member: Unspecified heckle
CB: I was playing Scrabble last night mate, I had C, N and T - all I needed was you!!!
Audience member: Unspecified heckle
CB: Don't interrupt me when I'm working, it's not fair - I don't come down to the docks and knock the c*cks out of your mouth!!!
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| Tubbs - Bromley | |||
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Posted Tues 24.10.40 0pm
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Mike | ||
I'll tell you one thing that pisses me off, is that despite asking for hi res pics of the comedians The News Shopper still failed to put us into the listings section for last weeks Summer Madness Show.
We send them listing way ahead of time and then again shortly before the show and ahead of print deadlines as a reminder.
Despite this dilligence we only have about a 50/50 chance of appearing if that.
What they do seem to have room for is the Crochet Club in Dartford, Poxy Dance classes using the Cunningham techniques in Greenwich and various Plate spinning and cube balancing shite that next to nobody is interested in, in Croydon.
We formed the Bromley Comedy because there was so little to do for thirty somethings in Bromley. The least the News Shopper could do is let people know about it.
Half the stuff in the What's on is Greenwich, Croydon, Bexley and Dartford. Don't these places have their own what's on? Should'nt Bromley events take president?
I think the chances are that the reporters that book the items are either not from Bromley and or, the News Shopper sister papers all print the same stuff.
Does anyone know the truth of it?
It seems some places seem to get a bit of favouritism as well
This stuff I thought was meant to be local info and often it just isn't
We have questioned them about it before and they waffle on that they can't print everything people send in.
Surely THE BROMLEY NEWS SHOPPER should print first the stuff happening in Bromley and then if there is any room squeeze in the other stufff Rant, rave, ranr, rave......etc etc
maybe you were looking for something to do this Saturday and knew nothing about our special show although you looked in the News Shopper!
can someone write to them and ask why?
Try this address: prevel@london.newsquest.co.uk
and let me know if you hear anything...
| Lofty | |||
Try to get there early on the Friday
After about 12 there never really seems to be much left, last year we thought that about that time would be fine, the only spot we found was right next to a walkway and only about 50m from the toilets
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Mike | ||
We are going to V festival in Chelmsford for the 1st time this year, camping 2 days...
if anyone has any tips we'd be glad of them.
I don't know if you noticed the Music at our gigs? But I'm going to be writing more about the music soon.
Also we are just organising our Edinburgh trip to The Comedy Fringe. We are all looking forward to finding the next big thing... Or the next little thing! and bringing them back to Bromley.
After about 12 there never really seems to be much left, last year we thought that about that time would be fine, the only spot we found was right next to a walkway and only about 50m from the toilets
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Mike | ||
OK so wev'e got a blog...
I'm not entirely sure exactly what we are gonna do with it but everyone else seems to have one. Maybe nothing.
I suppose the first thing I should say Is that I look forward to seeing you all for the Summer Madness Show this coming Saturday... I must say I have missed the Comedy in our Summer recess but wev'e also had a good chance to get out there and see some stuff.
We are trying to book Steven K Amos we saw him recently and think he's just great. I'm sure he is gonna be a big success in the future (when Lenny Henry dies) just kidding. That's a part of his own comedy set but probably quite apt.
Cheryl (the wife) say's nobody ever reads blogs and the people that post them up are really sad idiots with an overblown theory of their own self importance.
yes I suppose that's quite a good summation.
However